One bleak moment...
...was the moment I saw my MRI.
You know that feeling you have when you see a bad photo of yourself? "Ew... I'll hide this. I definitely look way too chubby in this picture. I can lose weight, though! I can work out. Besides, the angle was bad, I was tired, and what was I thinking when I put on that shirt!" etc, etc.
My MRI films, with their lesions and stripes, were completely exposing. They were obscene. I wanted to take them down from the wall, I wanted to deny that they were mine. Because I couldn't explain them away, I couldn't excuse them, and I couldn't change them by losing weight, working out, putting on more makeup, having lipo or getting a tan.
I saw them and turned into a pillar of salt.
"Once he finds out who he is, what can console him? ...for on Earth Everyone who lives, lives in a dream." --Calderon de la Barca
You know that feeling you have when you see a bad photo of yourself? "Ew... I'll hide this. I definitely look way too chubby in this picture. I can lose weight, though! I can work out. Besides, the angle was bad, I was tired, and what was I thinking when I put on that shirt!" etc, etc.
My MRI films, with their lesions and stripes, were completely exposing. They were obscene. I wanted to take them down from the wall, I wanted to deny that they were mine. Because I couldn't explain them away, I couldn't excuse them, and I couldn't change them by losing weight, working out, putting on more makeup, having lipo or getting a tan.
I saw them and turned into a pillar of salt.
"Once he finds out who he is, what can console him? ...for on Earth Everyone who lives, lives in a dream." --Calderon de la Barca
posted by Michele @ 8:42 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home